Single Parenting.... From a Male Perspective

As a single father I am in a somewhat unique position. I have been a single father for almost 5 years. I began raising my son one month after his third birthday. Yet more and more these day’s fathers are becoming the heads of single parent households. Furthermore, I was raised in a single parent household from the age of 10 in which my father was the head of household. I don't point this out to glorify single parenting because I believe the institution of marriage is a solid breeding ground for raising healthy and well balanced children. As long as the relationship between the mother and father is a health relationship. Not to mention the fact that single mothers have been leading single parent households for years.

But, as a single father I find it rewarding to wake up in the morning and prepare my son for a day of growth, blessings and lessons learned. When I wake my son, we have a talk about how he's feeling, conduct personal hygiene and get dress to start our day. On our way to the babysitter’s house I talk to my son about his personal responsibility to getting his education while in school and I reinforce to him that he has the "power to effect change". "What is that?" he said. I explain that whatever situation exist in his classroom such as his friends talking to him while the teacher is teaching a lesson or while at play if his classmate are treating someone badly I encourage my son to do his part to change the situation. For instance, if someone is disruptive to the class ask the teacher to move his chair and not to participate with that person. Furthermore, if one of his classmates is being treated badly by another classmate let the teacher know.

For some reason, some parents try to teach their children the code of the streets. Don't snitch on your friends, mind your own business and only worry about you (just to name a few). Well from experience and other people’s experiences this type of teaching has a very limited scope and it tends to backfire on the parents. For example, learning not to snitch could get your child a jail sentence, minding your own business could lead to a more secluded and distant child and only worry about you sometimes leads to the "it's all about me syndrome".

In my opinion it is important to teach children a balanced approach to life situations rather then from a skewed vantage point. I encourage you to encourage your child(ren) to realize their "power to effect change" in the world around them.